Bohra VibesBefore the rishta
Your first meeting after you both say yes
You both said yes and want to meet. Simple advice for a respectful, comfortable first meeting for a Bohra rishta: where, who comes, what to talk about.
By the Bohra Vibes team · · 1 min read
Keep it simple and comfortable
The first meeting is not an interview, and it is not a celebration yet. It is two people, and often their families, seeing if this could be a home.
Listen more than you speak. Notice how they treat the people around them, not only you.
Where and with whom
- Somewhere public and easy to reach, or at home with family: whatever both families are comfortable with.
- Many people bring a parent, sibling or elder. Agree on this beforehand so nobody is surprised.
- Daytime is easiest for everyone. An hour or two is enough.
What to talk about
- Start easyYour work, your city, your week.
- Then what mattersWhere you want to live, what deen looks like in your day, what you hope for in a marriage.
- Ask one question you really care aboutAnd really listen to the answer.
What to avoid
- Questions about looks, complexion or weight. They hurt, and they are not what a marriage is built on.
- Talking about money in front of everyone. Keep that for a private, honest conversation.
- Deciding on the spot. Go home, think, talk with people you trust.
After the meeting
Send a short message to say thank you, whatever you decide. If it is not right, say so kindly and soon. If it feels right, plan the next conversation.
Know someone looking for a rishta? Send them this.